Zelda Needs Her Beauty Sleep!
by Latasha
Summary: This is a humerous story that makes Zelda seem a bit ferocious... READ AND REVIEW! I wanna hear your complaints along with your praises!


I admit it! I have never played any of the Zelda games. I have only seen people play little bits of the games. I have heard a lot about it though. I have never typed a short story like this I warn you. So my story might seem a bit off. Why did I type this? One reason is because it only took a half an hour maybe less. Two because I have been typing the same old Final Fantasy and original stuff and most of my friends aren't that interested in the serious things. Since most of my friends love Zelda I decided to write a little humorous short story for them. Well... ENJOY! ^_^   
  
It was morning at Zelda's place. The sun was big and bright and. Well... Jolly... I guess... Chefs rushed around the kitchen preparing a hearty and nutritious breakfast for the youthful Zelda whom had not yet awakened and usually skipped breakfast anyway because she wakes up at twelve o' clock. She also hated being disturbed while sleeping. She'd throw a hissy fit and hurt the person that awoke her from her peaceful slumber.  
  
Zelda: ::rolls over and puts the pillow over her head. With a free hand she grabs her teddy bear and holds it close to her. Drool drips down her mouth:: Aw... Candy cows... Wait... Huh?! I said I wanted candy canes you fool! ::yells at people in her sleep::  
  
Meanwhile Link has woken up in one of the guest bedrooms by the smell of the delicious food. He follows his nose to the kitchen where sweet smelling aromas filled the air.  
  
Link: Yah! Breakfast time! Is it almost done???!!!  
  
Head Chef: Almost... But we can't eat until Zelda wakes up.  
  
Link: Well, when does she usually wake up?  
  
Head Chef: ::sigh:: not until lunchtime...  
  
Link: WHAT?! That's ridiculous!  
  
Head Chef: We usually don't eat breakfast.  
  
Link: WHAT?! That's ridiculous!  
  
Head Chef: Yeah... We usually throw it all away...  
  
Link: WHAT?! That's ridiculous!  
  
Head Chef: Stop saying that!  
  
Link: ::puts hands on his hips and has his chin up. Too much pride is in his voice:: I, being the hero, will wake her up! Then we can eat!  
  
Head Chef: Just remember I didn't put you up to this. It was all YOUR idea...  
  
Link: Sure! I'll take all the credit! Well I'll go wake her up now... ::runs off having no idea how much hurt he is going to feel soon...::  
  
Assistant to Head Chef: That was cruel... Why didn't you warn him?  
  
Head Chef: If he gets hurt or not Zelda will be awake and we'll all be able to eat... He has probably felt worse pain... Right?  
  
Assistant to Head Chef: -_-;  
  
Link runs up the stairs and enters Zelda's room. She is innocently fast asleep. Link walks over to the bed and taps her on the shoulder.  
  
Link: Wakey wakey Zeldy!! ^_^  
  
Zelda: ::no response::  
  
Link: ::Taps her harder::  
  
Zelda: ::still no response::  
  
Link: WHAT?! That's ridiculous!... ... ... ::starts shaking Zelda to death::  
  
Zelda: ::yawns but doesn't wake up::  
  
Link: ::scratches his head:: this is mission impossible... ::spots Zelda's teddy bear:: ohh... It looks so soft and cuddly... I wanna hold it! ::Grabs the bear:: Ooooh! It is soft and cuddly! ::Dances with the bear:: ^_^  
  
Zelda: ::notices that her bear is missing and jumps up onto of the bed:: YOU TOOK MR. TEDDY!!!! AND YOU WOKE ME UP!!!!  
  
Link: ::scared to death, holds out the teddy to her:: Here! Take the bear! Just don't hurt me! Please!  
  
Zelda: ::grabs the bear and inspects making sure nothing had been done to it:: YAH! Mr. Teddy is okay! Thanks for not hurting Mr. Teddy, Link.  
  
Link: ::relieved sigh:: yeah... You really seemed mad. I'm glad you aren't angry with me anymore... Man, I had seen my short life all over again and could of swore you were going to kill me... I was waiting for the bright light.  
  
Zelda: ::carefully puts her teddy down and puts her hands on her hips:: Who said I wasn't still mad at you?! You woke me up! How dare you wake me up! Now you die! ::Jumps off of the bed and onto Link. With Link on the ground she gets up and starts kicking him::  
  
Link: WHAT?! This is ridiculous!.. OWW!!! That kinda, OWIE! hurts! Ugh!  
  
Zelda: ::Grabs the frying pan from under her pillow and starts banging him on the head with it in a frenzy:: You sure have a hard head... ::The pan has a giant dent on it but Link's head is in perfect condition::  
  
Link: Why thankyou...  
  
Zelda: ::Throws the frying pan to the side hitting Impa as he entered the room::  
  
Impa: birdies... WOOHOO!!!  
  
Link: WHAT?! That's ridiculous! ::with Zelda's attention briefly directed toward Impa, he gets up and makes a run for the window where he would jump out and play a song on his ocarina to make him fly::  
  
Zelda: ::sees Link trying to escaped and jumps on her back pounding him::  
  
Link: ::runs in circles with Zelda on his back. he starts to wiggle around trying to get her off him::  
  
Impa: WOOHOO BIRDIES!!!  
  
Link: ::reaches for his ocarina but realizes that it isn't there. He had dropped it while dancing with the bear and it was lying on the floor next to the bed. Link runs to it and bends over to pick it up::  
  
Zelda: ::bites Link's ear making him grab his ear in pain:: Hehehe!  
  
Link: ::hops up and down holding his ear:: AHH!!!! Impa help!  
  
Impa: WOOHOO! GO BIRDIES GO! FLY!!!  
  
Zelda ::drums on Link's head with drumsticks she found in his pocket::  
  
Link: Hey! Put those back! That is my snack! (Drumstick as in chicken. I fooled you! Hehe!) ::A chunk of the chicken falls. He makes an attempt to catch it but misses and it hits the ground with a plop:: NOO!! ::drops to his knees and starts to cry::  
  
Zelda: ::drops the chicken and stops attacking Link. His ear is bleeding and tears are flowing down his cheeks.:: Why are you crying?  
  
Link: WAHH!!!  
  
Zelda: I'm sorry... I didn't wanna hurt you that much...  
  
Impa: NO BIRDIES! THATS NO CAVE! ITS A CAT'S MOUTH! ::Impa now wakes up and gets on his knees beside Link and starts to cry:: NO! The birdies got eaten!!  
  
Link: No... Its not that you hurt me... Its... The chicken... ::Holds the fallen chunk up to her:: Its wasted! WAHH! ::starts crying more::  
  
Zelda: ^_^; ... ... ... ::stares at the two pitiful people. Take her frying pan and bangs Impa on the head::  
  
Impa: ::falls over silently::  
  
Zelda: ::about to hit Link with the frying pan to shut him up but decides it wouldn't work anyway. She simply kicks him in his weak empty stomach::  
  
Link: ::falls over unconscious::  
  
Zelda: ::yawns and stretches. Walks over to her bed and falls asleep with her teddy bear in her arms again:: I SAID CANDY CANES NOT CANDY COWS! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS LINK?!!  
  
Link from her dreams: ::holds a life size chocolate cow:: These are so much better though! Candy canes are too minty anyway. Having minty breath can be dangerous at times you know...  
  
Zelda: .... ... Idiot...  
  
Dun dun dah! The end! I'd like to extra specially thank Wes and Vince for telling me all about this game! I'd also extra specially like to apologize if I have done anything wrong in this story that is just way too off. I know that one of the problems might be that Zelda is too ferocious but... DEAL WITH IT! Also, as I have been informed by Wes, Link never talks during any of the games. I think that is pitiful. But how could I write a story like this without him being able to talk?! Huh PUNK?!!  
  
^_^; or -_-; = anime sweat drop thing  
  
^_^ = HYPER HAPPY!!  
  
-_- = kinda annoyed or thinks something is pitiful 


End file.
